OCT. 30-2011 ALONG MY JOURNEY IN LIFE

SHALOM!

AS I WROTE IN MY LAST BLOG, I AM SO ACCEPTING OF ANY OTHER AILMENT AS LONG AS IT IS NOT CANCER. BUT I SURE DO PAY THE PRICE. THE HIVES, WHICH SOUND SO TRIVIAL, ENDED UP IN A MAJOR RAVAGING OF MY BODY, MY LIPS, MY WHOLE BEING. IT WAS FIRST DIAGNOSED AS BUGS IN MY BED-THEREFORE, BOIL EVERY SHEET, TOWEL, CLOTHING ETC. MAKE PESACH TOTAL IN YOUR BED. DONE. -DIDN'T WORK. LEFT MY BED FOR A MONTH-WHEREVER I SLEPT, I WAS AWAKENED COVERED WITH HIVES FROM SCALP TO FEET. MY STOMACH WAS FINALLY LIKE A PATCH OF KALANIYOT. I COULD NOT WEAR UNDERWEAR PLUS...

AFTER ONE HISTAMINE, AND A STRONGER ONE, AND MANY DR. VISITS, I FINALLY ENDED UP IN 'TEREM' EMERGENCY, FOR EVEN A STRONGER HISTAMINE. LAST STOP WAS A ONE DAY TRIP TO A MAJOR ISRAELI HOSPITAL FOR FULL BODY TESTING FROM VARIOUS DRS., BLOOD WORK ETC. THANKS TO MY SON. IT SEEMS THAT ALTHO' I KNOW THAT I HAVE 'CHRONIC CUTICARIA'-THAT IS, I BREAK OUT EVERY FEW YEARS IN HIVES, WITH NO WAY TO KNOW WHAT IT'S FROM, THIS WAS A MAJOR ATTACK-IT SEEMS THAT MY IMMUNE SYSTEM (PROBABLY FROM THE CANCER TREATMENTS) WAS VERY LOW, AND THAT MY BODY WAS ATTACKING ITS OWN CELLS. SO I AM NOW ON HIGH STEROIDS FOR A FEW WEEKS. THANK G. TO FIND A DR. WHO KNOWS WHAT HE/SHE IS DOING. MORE TEST ARE YET TO COME, BUT I AM FINALLY SOMEWHAT HUMAN AFTER AT LEAST 3 STRAIGHT MONTHS OF 'TORTURE'.

I MUST LEARN TO PAY MORE ATTENTION TO ALL AILMENTS, ALTH' I DID. MY REGULAR DR. JUST POO-POOED IT EXCEPT TO GIVE ME A PILL AND SCARE ME THAT I HAD BUGS CRAWLING ABOUT ON ME AND WAS BITTEN. CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT FEELING?

I AM SLOWLY LEARNING TO ACCEPT MORE AND MORE THAT LIFE HAS ITS CONSTANT CONSTANT UPS AND DOWNS IN PHYSICAL HAPPENINGS, IN PERSONAL HAPPENINGS, IN LIFE ITSELF. I REALIZE MORE AND MORE WHEN I FEEL SO WEAK THAT NO WONDER WE ALL DIE AT SOME POINT-WE WEAR OUT. BUT EACH DAY I THANK G. FOR BEING ALIVE TODAY, AND TRY TO ENJOY AND LIVE WELL WHATEVER TIME I HAVE. SIMPLY SAID-A CHALLENGE TO DO.

TWICE IN THE PAST FEW DAYS I HAVE BEEN TOLD THAT I AM NOW 'OLD'. I FOUND IT SHOCKING. I KNOW THAT I AM OF GOOD AGE-74, BUT OLD? I WANT TO LIVE AND LIVE AND SEE MORE GRANDCHILDREN GET MARRIED, GET BAR MITZVAED, ETC. SO SINCE I CAN'T TOTALLY CONTROL ANY OF THIS, I STRIVE TO EAT HEALTHY, TO EXERCISE, TO BREATHE, TO SMILE, TO LIVE, TO LEARN.
I SEND OUT MY SINCERE WISHES TO ANY READER FOR GOOD HEALTH AND A GOOD PAYING OF ATTENTION TO YOUR OWN NEEDS.

AS NOVEMBER IS ALMOST HERE, LET'S HOPE FOR GOOD THINGS.

OCT. 3-2011 SOME THOUGHTS

HELLO TO MY BLOG :

AS time goes on, new challenges, and each one, however painful, bothersome, worrisome for the time, I keep reminding myself that this is not cancer, this is not cancer. Often it takes me time to have another test to reassure myself that this is indeed not a symptom of cancer in my body.
so hives, bladder infection, jaw pain, fatigue all continue to come and go, and I try to breeze thru' each new challenge. The regular breast examinations, pelvic and abdominal tests, keep me I hope under good observation.

My mind still grapples with faith-are we just mere human beings like the animals, the ants, the flowers, who have a certain amount of time on earth, partly in good health, partly suffering until the ultimate death which comes to all. Is there really an upper one G. who is setting out our individual trials and ultimate time of death? What/whom is G.? And so I read and read and observe people, nature, our faith and ponder constantly. Perhaps I will never have a definite answer-I know that I belong to our people, to our faith and tradition, and welcome that with open arms.

I will never take life for granted-each day, each hour is so very precious-to live and enjoy as best we can-to do some good while we can physically and mentally.

I pray for all those who are suffering for a recovery as best can be and for the strength to deal with what we must do.

Until the next time,

'bye for now