Hello:
today, July 21, 2010, I finished my radiation treatment at Hadassah Ein Karem. This part, compared to the 2 series of chemotherapy were a relative breeze. Fatigue accompanied me all the way thru' cancer, and I mean utter fatigue. But the nauseousness and general bad feelings of inability to eat, to drink, to be somewhat of a person only came back when I was doing the radiation. I am afraid to say 'hallelujah' yet, although I am so very thankful that hopefully, the cancer of the breast is now negligent. Of course, we may not know for many years to come if it totally succeeded.
But due to some family concerns, I may need to do more testing and/or removing of another anatomical part to ensure no further cancer. But I will write more about that after I return to my oncologist and have further discussions. In the meantime, I will have regular breast examinations, mammograms, ultra sounds, etc. and regular visits to my oncologist on an ongoing basis.
I cannot say that I am dancing on clouds, as I have this reserved worry. But I am so thankful for coming this far. I haven't announced it yet to anyone, so you, my readers, are the first to know that I have completed this 9 month siege on my body. Lucky are those who can only identify with
9 months of pregnancy and can go home with a lovely newborn. But to go home knowing that everything was done to eradicate this cancer is indeed wonderful.
I continue to pray for myself, and for all sick people that I know about, and don't know about. I wish you each good health and speedy recoveries.
I welcome any comments from you back to me.
Yours,
chaya bat sarah bayla
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Monday, July 12, 2010
JULY 12-10 'RADIATING' ALONG
Shalom!
Well, I am in 2nd week of radiation, and thank G. no burning and redness of affected area. But fatigue, fatigue, which has become a part of me through this whole process. But I see a light at the end of this tunnel of this part of cancer. Then we shall see what follows. I feel very lucky that the cancer was caught before it spread to the lymph nodes. That is the blessing of going yearly for mammograms and catching it early. Thank you, universe!
When I look around me in the waiting room which seems endless, all roads of life pass here-Jewish, Arab, Christian, religious, non-religious, we are all in the same boat. Each prays or doesn't pray in his own way, to somehow survive and still be a functioning person with years left to live. I wish a speedy recovery for all.
I add on that during such a roller coaster, emotional period of time, 9 months for me so far, the support of some individuals has made the whole difference for me. The lack of caring from others has hurt me terribly. I find it very difficult to see 'religious' people around showing no empathy or caring, even by a phone call.
Have a good week!
chaya bat sarah
Well, I am in 2nd week of radiation, and thank G. no burning and redness of affected area. But fatigue, fatigue, which has become a part of me through this whole process. But I see a light at the end of this tunnel of this part of cancer. Then we shall see what follows. I feel very lucky that the cancer was caught before it spread to the lymph nodes. That is the blessing of going yearly for mammograms and catching it early. Thank you, universe!
When I look around me in the waiting room which seems endless, all roads of life pass here-Jewish, Arab, Christian, religious, non-religious, we are all in the same boat. Each prays or doesn't pray in his own way, to somehow survive and still be a functioning person with years left to live. I wish a speedy recovery for all.
I add on that during such a roller coaster, emotional period of time, 9 months for me so far, the support of some individuals has made the whole difference for me. The lack of caring from others has hurt me terribly. I find it very difficult to see 'religious' people around showing no empathy or caring, even by a phone call.
Have a good week!
chaya bat sarah
Sunday, July 4, 2010
JULY 4-10: THOUGHTS ON RADIATION ET AL
Hello once again:
I have now had 4 radiation treatments. Thank G. the treatment itself is quick, and nonpainful in any way. The getting to and fro,and the long waiting outside are lengthy. So you very easily use up a whole morning with this business, whether you come early or mid morning.
What has me so shocked is seeing the vast numbers of cancer patients, some of whom are still SMOKING, regardless of their state. It simply boggles my mind! I see people from all walks of life, rich, poor, religious, non-religious, Arab, Christian, Jewish, you see it all! I sometimes feel like I am in a group who is dealing with death close by but trying to keep on living. Will all of us gain years from all these months of treatments? Will we live without pain or declining in our abilities? How does one keep up a sense of optimism? Remember, from Oct. 09, I for one, has had my life center around operation, chemotherapy for months, infections, radiation and now in July, 2010 my life still centers around my coping ability. I have given up many outside activities due to fatigue. I grab my sleeping hours when I can, forgetting about a social life in the evenings for the most part.
I have given up my summer yearly travel to my home of origin. But hopefully, I will rise above this year and become active and motivated to do new things again in the future.
I remind myself always to be thankful that it is not worse for me. I have been told that by the end of a couple of more radiation treatments, I will have some negative reactions and more fatigue again. But so far so good, thank goodness.
I wish each and every reader good healthy days-enjoy life while we can.
I have now had 4 radiation treatments. Thank G. the treatment itself is quick, and nonpainful in any way. The getting to and fro,and the long waiting outside are lengthy. So you very easily use up a whole morning with this business, whether you come early or mid morning.
What has me so shocked is seeing the vast numbers of cancer patients, some of whom are still SMOKING, regardless of their state. It simply boggles my mind! I see people from all walks of life, rich, poor, religious, non-religious, Arab, Christian, Jewish, you see it all! I sometimes feel like I am in a group who is dealing with death close by but trying to keep on living. Will all of us gain years from all these months of treatments? Will we live without pain or declining in our abilities? How does one keep up a sense of optimism? Remember, from Oct. 09, I for one, has had my life center around operation, chemotherapy for months, infections, radiation and now in July, 2010 my life still centers around my coping ability. I have given up many outside activities due to fatigue. I grab my sleeping hours when I can, forgetting about a social life in the evenings for the most part.
I have given up my summer yearly travel to my home of origin. But hopefully, I will rise above this year and become active and motivated to do new things again in the future.
I remind myself always to be thankful that it is not worse for me. I have been told that by the end of a couple of more radiation treatments, I will have some negative reactions and more fatigue again. But so far so good, thank goodness.
I wish each and every reader good healthy days-enjoy life while we can.
Monday, June 21, 2010
JUNE 21-10 THE NEWEST CHALLENGE
I am now onto radiation. It was unbelievable to feel almost normal in the 1 week of no chemo. But psychologically and emotionally, I was and am still down that pit, trying to climb out, or trying to keep afloat in the ocean of worry, despondence, and not quite fitting in all around me.
But one foot goes in front of the other, and I try to enjoy each opportunity that comes my way. Had my first radiation meeting explaining to me briefly what it entails. This 2nd meeting was to paint the exact areas to be radiated. I would fit in well in an Indian tribe right now. By the grace of above, because I had no lymph nodes detected due to my yearly mammogram (DO IT), I will only need 3 1/2 weeks of daily radiation rather than 6 weeks. The challenge is more how to switch my mind from negative to positive hope, and where do I fit in, when until now my whole world has been weekly trips to the hospital and then living its after effects. Now this period will be to cope with the side effects of radiation. Hard to jump to each test, and to be somewhat 'normal' to the outside world.
That's about it in a nutshell for now. I wish good health to all.
But one foot goes in front of the other, and I try to enjoy each opportunity that comes my way. Had my first radiation meeting explaining to me briefly what it entails. This 2nd meeting was to paint the exact areas to be radiated. I would fit in well in an Indian tribe right now. By the grace of above, because I had no lymph nodes detected due to my yearly mammogram (DO IT), I will only need 3 1/2 weeks of daily radiation rather than 6 weeks. The challenge is more how to switch my mind from negative to positive hope, and where do I fit in, when until now my whole world has been weekly trips to the hospital and then living its after effects. Now this period will be to cope with the side effects of radiation. Hard to jump to each test, and to be somewhat 'normal' to the outside world.
That's about it in a nutshell for now. I wish good health to all.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
june 8-TAXOL CHEMOTHERAPY TO STOP
HELLO:
Well, my 8th and last taxol chemo treatment was done yesterday. I imagine I will have the same fatigue feelings and feet and hand sensations, but it's another series finished. It is kind of scary, as going each week I knew that they are working on killing 'whatever' remains of cancer are there. But it was a stiff price to pay weekly, with 2 infections along the way.
Next week, I will go for a preliminary assessment for radiation at Hadassah Ein Karem. Then I will know more of what is in store for me. But there will be an interim now for my body to recuperate.
Had my breasts checked today with my surgeon-all o'kay, thank G. will come every 6 mos. and do a mammogram first to bring him.
My feelings are one of worry ( to discuss at a much later point) and utter fatigue. But hopefully, some light ahead. I must learn to live 'in the moment'. Life is right now, today. Yesterday is gone, past. Tomorrow is anyone's guess. So as much as I want to live and enjoy, I need to rest quite a bit.
Thanks again to all of who who are supporting me in your own way.
I hope that any readers are doing well in their lives.
Well, my 8th and last taxol chemo treatment was done yesterday. I imagine I will have the same fatigue feelings and feet and hand sensations, but it's another series finished. It is kind of scary, as going each week I knew that they are working on killing 'whatever' remains of cancer are there. But it was a stiff price to pay weekly, with 2 infections along the way.
Next week, I will go for a preliminary assessment for radiation at Hadassah Ein Karem. Then I will know more of what is in store for me. But there will be an interim now for my body to recuperate.
Had my breasts checked today with my surgeon-all o'kay, thank G. will come every 6 mos. and do a mammogram first to bring him.
My feelings are one of worry ( to discuss at a much later point) and utter fatigue. But hopefully, some light ahead. I must learn to live 'in the moment'. Life is right now, today. Yesterday is gone, past. Tomorrow is anyone's guess. So as much as I want to live and enjoy, I need to rest quite a bit.
Thanks again to all of who who are supporting me in your own way.
I hope that any readers are doing well in their lives.
Saturday, June 5, 2010
JUNE 6-10 ALONG THE CANCER JOURNEY
Shalom
I seem less inclined to write lately, due to my extreme fatigue and worry. After the attack on my colon, I have lived in fear of another such attack. But thank G., I am simply tired, tired, along with the tingling of fingers and toes and exhaustion. So I choose to stay home for the most part, except for my teaching and some exercise to keep alive. Thank goodness for my little dog, which forces me out for short outings as well.
I have become a real kvetch. Reading and tv occupy my time mostly. I am so thankful for any books passed my way.
Anyways, I can hardly believe that tomorrow, June 7, may be my last Taxol chemo treatment. Most people have 12 treatments, but Dr. Cherney feels 8 is best for me. Then a rest to give my body a chance to recoup, and on to radiation. I have become so accustomed to treatment each week-I won't know what or how to cope.
Let's hope that tomorrow will pass o'kay with no bad effects.
Have a good day.
chaya bat sarah bayla
I seem less inclined to write lately, due to my extreme fatigue and worry. After the attack on my colon, I have lived in fear of another such attack. But thank G., I am simply tired, tired, along with the tingling of fingers and toes and exhaustion. So I choose to stay home for the most part, except for my teaching and some exercise to keep alive. Thank goodness for my little dog, which forces me out for short outings as well.
I have become a real kvetch. Reading and tv occupy my time mostly. I am so thankful for any books passed my way.
Anyways, I can hardly believe that tomorrow, June 7, may be my last Taxol chemo treatment. Most people have 12 treatments, but Dr. Cherney feels 8 is best for me. Then a rest to give my body a chance to recoup, and on to radiation. I have become so accustomed to treatment each week-I won't know what or how to cope.
Let's hope that tomorrow will pass o'kay with no bad effects.
Have a good day.
chaya bat sarah bayla
Thursday, May 27, 2010
MAY 28-10 ANOTHER SNAG ALONG THE WAY
Shalom!
Well, another detour along my path to, hopefully, good health. After chemo #6 in this Taxol series, I developed excruciating stomach pains in my left side. That was followed by a sudden bleeding as well. In the hospital, I went thru' a CT scan. It seems that with the chemo, and then antibiotics for my arm problem way back in the first series, my immune system is low. Therefore I am more prone to infections. That's why I was so against chemo to begin with. So not new chemo treatment was given for now. I am once again on new antibiotics as the attack is on my colon, called 'colitis'. What I drink or eat will help nor harm, altho' I do try to eat less to make the colon work less. That is not very successful for me. Hopefully, when I finish my week of antibiotics, we may be able to resume the chemo treatment. I await to hear from my oncologist who decides. Being at home, resting a lot, seems to be my one way to cope these days.
I thank my readers who are hopeful and caring for me. Until the next write-up or editing of this one, bye for now.
Well, another detour along my path to, hopefully, good health. After chemo #6 in this Taxol series, I developed excruciating stomach pains in my left side. That was followed by a sudden bleeding as well. In the hospital, I went thru' a CT scan. It seems that with the chemo, and then antibiotics for my arm problem way back in the first series, my immune system is low. Therefore I am more prone to infections. That's why I was so against chemo to begin with. So not new chemo treatment was given for now. I am once again on new antibiotics as the attack is on my colon, called 'colitis'. What I drink or eat will help nor harm, altho' I do try to eat less to make the colon work less. That is not very successful for me. Hopefully, when I finish my week of antibiotics, we may be able to resume the chemo treatment. I await to hear from my oncologist who decides. Being at home, resting a lot, seems to be my one way to cope these days.
I thank my readers who are hopeful and caring for me. Until the next write-up or editing of this one, bye for now.
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